Procrastination is something we’re all guilty of. Like, don’t even deny it. I know you do it too. Because I love to share, I would like to offer you some of my favourite procrastination actives to try out this SWOTVAC season. Sure, your assignment is due at midnight, but that can wait; procrastination comes first. Gosh, get your priorities in order.
I cry about everything. What can I say? I’m a sensitive guy. As my assignments start to pile up, I get really stressed out and my natural reaction is to start uncontrollably crying. While it sounds really unhealthy, I actually find it cathartic; after I’ve finished a weeping session, I’ll feel refreshed and ready to take on the world. Sometimes I’ll even purposefully make myself cry so I can kickstart this process. I’ll listen to sad music (I have a Spotify playlist) or watch a really tragic movie (The Fox and the Hound is my favourite). Give it a try!
SWOTVAC season is when my inner Nigella comes out to play. When I have a bunch of essays on the horizon, rather than getting started on then, my brain tells itself that it’s time to have my Adriano Zumbo moment. I’m talking macarons, cheesecakes, cupcakes, brownies, and just about anything that isn’t my assignment. Baking is actually really cathartic too. I especially love baking things with yeast; I can sit there for a few hours and watching my cinnamon roll dough rising—the opposite of my chances at scoring a decent mark.
On a related note, my assignment writing process involves almost as many visits to the fridge as the words I’m typing in my document. I justify my consumption of mass amounts of food as ‘needing brain food to study’. But really, it’s just me losing all inhibitions at this stressful time in my life. “Should you really be eating a whole packet of chips, a box of cookies and a tub of ice-cream?” my brain asks me. “Yes bitch,” I reply.
4. Reorganising your wardrobe
During my last assignment-related crisis, I decided that I wanted a new look for my wardrobe. I took everything out, sorted through my clothes into piles—one to keep, and one to donate—, and then arranged my clothes in the colours of the rainbow. And this was all in an effort to not write an essay.
In the midst of my 2500 word essay, I’ll be suddenly overcome by the need to clean my room. Everything is all of a sudden so messy, and I can’t study in such an untidy environment. SWOTVAC is also prime spring cleaning season; I’ll take a short (3+ hour) break to rearrange everything in my room and throw a bunch of things out as part of my cleansing ritual.
6. Binge-watching Lizzie McGuire
Assignment season is also the best time to binge watch a TV show. A personal favourite of mine to revisit is Lizzie McGuire. It’s a fun, lighthearted show full of teen drama and wholesome life lessons to be learnt. And there are only two seasons, so getting through the entire series is really achievable.
7. Impulsively shopping online
Someone should honestly take away my credit card and block my PayPal account during SWOTVAC. I start throwing caution to the wind and making it rain. I buy anything I find— clothes, concert tickets, items signed by Milo Ventimiglia—and tell myself I deserve a treat for working so hard. Retail therapy in its finest form.
8. Getting a haircut
Cutting your hair is cathartic. Kind of like how people cut their hair or get a dye job after a break up. Britney Spears was definitely onto something back in ’07. Plus, you may as well look cute while you’re going through your SWOTVAC crisis. Fight your assignments in style!
9. Suddenly becoming #fitspogoals
After morning TV shows and sphinx cats, exercise is my least favourite thing in the world. I absolutely despise any form of physical activity. So you know I’m really desperate to burn up some time, in order to further put off writing my assignment, when I actually want to get out of the house for a brisk walk/run.
10. Writing for Wasteland Online
As I'm writing my essay on German Weimar cinema or some media theorist from the ‘50s, my mind begins to wander. Coincidentally, this is when I become inspired to write. Not my essay though; I’ll start getting brilliant ideas for pieces to write for this blog. In fact, this the idea for this piece came about through procrastination. How meta!